Being in a relationship can be a fulfilling experience for the people involved. However, if one or both partners have a problem expressing anger in a healthy way, that can lead to problems in the relationship. The angry partner may struggle to control his or her emotions and experience frustration and regret on a regular basis, while the other partner may feel sad, upset or emotionally drained. While fixing an anger issue does not happen overnight, there are ways to facilitate the process.
1. Address the Issue
If angry outbursts have a damaging effect on the relationship, then the partners need to have a conversation about what is going on. This discussion should happen when both people are as calm and relaxed as possible. When talking about the issue, it is important to remember that emotions are usually involuntary, but people can learn to control their responses. The inability to control angry outbursts can lead to trouble, especially if the angry person lashes out physically and ends up facing legal trouble and the need for a court ordered education program.
Responding to anger with more anger can escalate the situation. It is important to set and enforce boundaries to protect both partners. If the angry partner crosses the line by saying or doing anything inappropriate, the other person should try to calmly exit the situation. Shelving the discussion can give both people time to cool down and approach the conversation in a better frame of mind later.
3. Enlist Help
Speaking with a professional can help the partners understand what is causing the anger issues and address them appropriately. If the partner who suffers from an anger problem is resistant to therapy, then the other person can go alone or try to find other helpful resources.
The stability and comfort of being in a solid, committed relationship gives many people joy. If an anger issue poses a threat to the relationship, then it is important for the people involved to take steps to resolve the problem quickly.